Why Do I Try?
Why do I try to be a good person, even if I frequently fail? It's a question I frequently ask myself - but why should I be asking myself at all? Shouldn't I be secure in the knowledge that I am trying? Is my questioning a sign that I'm a bad person? I don't know - but what I do know is that I question myself to find reasons for things, to help me understand myself a bit better and to clear up the murky waters of my mind. And I suppose I'm questioning myself, too, to prove something to myself - to prove that my motives are pure. Maybe I will succeed in that, maybe I won't. I don't know; this is mainly a thought exercise. I know what aren't my motives, though... 1. I don't try to be a good person because I get off on the warm, fuzzy feelings. Well, to be honest, I do get off on the warm, fuzzy feelings I get when helping someone else out - but that's not my motive to be a good person. It's a nice...a nice side-effect, if you will, but...