Articles from six months ago...
...They're driving me crazy. Well, not so much the articles themselves as people commenting on them.
It all revolves around children failing, or their lack of failure, and what to do about that. According to some articles and a bunch of studies, if children are always told they're unique and special and not given things to challenge them - things where they'll fail or get the answers wrong - they'll become lazy and take things for granted. This applies particularly to Generation Y, born between 1982 and 1999.
Aside from said articles and studies, I haven't found any empirical evidence of this (which might be because I'm a part of Generation Y and therefore have a relatively skewed viewpoint) aside from talking to my mum, who thinks that my generation's shallow - but she always thinks that, so that wasn't really helpful.
A spin-off from that is this article, which talks about children getting handouts and pep talks for not getting a part in the school play - actually, I'll link to the handout while I'm at it. I was fairly indifferent to what was being said - it was interesting, but I really didn't have any opinions.
However, the comments shocked me. They were along the lines of "Suck it up" and "Life is tough, ner ner nee ner ner you're a wuss because sometimes you get sad, ha" for the most part - there were a couple of people, mostly parents, who were significantly saner about the whole thing, but many people seemed to miss the point and conflate "helping people to bounce back" with "everyone must have prizes" - I'll discuss this point in greater detail later. These points are really just disjointed notes, by the way.
I'll start off with a minor one. Firstly, the handout given to the primary-school students was based on suggestions from the students themselves - in other words, it was less like counselling and more like friendly advice. Last time I checked, friendly advice didn't magically turn people into wusses.
Another minor point: the handout ends telling pupils to "bounce back" and talks about "growing from life's set backs [sic]". In other words, it's telling the students to pick themselves up, dust themselves off and try harder; again, this doesn't turn people into wusses. It's the opposite of turning people into wusses, dammit! It's encouraging them to go right back in there and try and fail again! And, ignoring the copious exclamation marks everywhere - which I've put in because I'm now quite worked up - it's probably the best advice you can give someone to STOP them from being a wuss!
*exhales deeply* Right. Now I'm less angry and I can speak like a normal human being.
Counselling, friendly advice and handouts don't make people into wusses - they serve as a way of letting people down gently the first time so that they're better off next time, and the time after that, and the time after that...Mocking people and telling them to get down on their knees makes the problem worse. Also, helping people to get up after a metaphorical fall doesn't equate to giving everyone prizes. Awarding people for slacking off and giving them a bit of advice aren't exactly the same thing.
No, life isn't fair and it doesn't give everyone prizes - that doesn't mean that it should be unnecessarily harsh or that people should be discouraged from trying by telling them that they're going to fail so many times that it doesn't matter.
Just because you're bitter about your life and your failings (and I think that that applies to several of the commenters who were talking about how many failures there are in life) doesn't mean that you should trip up other people - especially as you're supposed to be grown adults.
Some of the commenters also mentioned that they grew up in a generation where they were presumably told to suck it up, had to walk to school uphill both ways, lived in a crumpled shoebox, and had stewed boots for tea and liked it - and they turned out just fine! Judging by their bitterness, I'd say that they're carrying an awful lot of spiteful baggage for somebody who turned out just fine.
For those commenters who were worrying that advice turns people into wusses, don't worry, they'll learn. Life is a harsh teacher, but you pull through it with some scrapes and bruises or you don't pull through at all, in which case there is probably more wrong than just being given handouts to HELP you.
While school plays and captaincies might not look like a big deal to someone pushing middle age, in the very sheltered world of a child - and school could conceivably be the world or society at large to one - it's probably like the equivalent of running for president and failing, possibly even more so as they're young and have little to compare with.
Finally, no, life isn't fair - as I've already mentioned. But no, you don't suck it up, nor do you go blindly in and try again to get the same results as before. You up your game and fight harder - and it pays off. If anything, that last part about hard work and fighting for what you want is what we should really be teaching our kids, not telling them that they're special snowflakes or that they're failures and should suck it up. Only then could we end up with a generation that's not as lazy or bitter as some of the examples on offer now.
(In other news, I have a GCSE tomorrow. Eep!)
It all revolves around children failing, or their lack of failure, and what to do about that. According to some articles and a bunch of studies, if children are always told they're unique and special and not given things to challenge them - things where they'll fail or get the answers wrong - they'll become lazy and take things for granted. This applies particularly to Generation Y, born between 1982 and 1999.
Aside from said articles and studies, I haven't found any empirical evidence of this (which might be because I'm a part of Generation Y and therefore have a relatively skewed viewpoint) aside from talking to my mum, who thinks that my generation's shallow - but she always thinks that, so that wasn't really helpful.
A spin-off from that is this article, which talks about children getting handouts and pep talks for not getting a part in the school play - actually, I'll link to the handout while I'm at it. I was fairly indifferent to what was being said - it was interesting, but I really didn't have any opinions.
However, the comments shocked me. They were along the lines of "Suck it up" and "Life is tough, ner ner nee ner ner you're a wuss because sometimes you get sad, ha" for the most part - there were a couple of people, mostly parents, who were significantly saner about the whole thing, but many people seemed to miss the point and conflate "helping people to bounce back" with "everyone must have prizes" - I'll discuss this point in greater detail later. These points are really just disjointed notes, by the way.
I'll start off with a minor one. Firstly, the handout given to the primary-school students was based on suggestions from the students themselves - in other words, it was less like counselling and more like friendly advice. Last time I checked, friendly advice didn't magically turn people into wusses.
Another minor point: the handout ends telling pupils to "bounce back" and talks about "growing from life's set backs [sic]". In other words, it's telling the students to pick themselves up, dust themselves off and try harder; again, this doesn't turn people into wusses. It's the opposite of turning people into wusses, dammit! It's encouraging them to go right back in there and try and fail again! And, ignoring the copious exclamation marks everywhere - which I've put in because I'm now quite worked up - it's probably the best advice you can give someone to STOP them from being a wuss!
*exhales deeply* Right. Now I'm less angry and I can speak like a normal human being.
Counselling, friendly advice and handouts don't make people into wusses - they serve as a way of letting people down gently the first time so that they're better off next time, and the time after that, and the time after that...Mocking people and telling them to get down on their knees makes the problem worse. Also, helping people to get up after a metaphorical fall doesn't equate to giving everyone prizes. Awarding people for slacking off and giving them a bit of advice aren't exactly the same thing.
No, life isn't fair and it doesn't give everyone prizes - that doesn't mean that it should be unnecessarily harsh or that people should be discouraged from trying by telling them that they're going to fail so many times that it doesn't matter.
Just because you're bitter about your life and your failings (and I think that that applies to several of the commenters who were talking about how many failures there are in life) doesn't mean that you should trip up other people - especially as you're supposed to be grown adults.
Some of the commenters also mentioned that they grew up in a generation where they were presumably told to suck it up, had to walk to school uphill both ways, lived in a crumpled shoebox, and had stewed boots for tea and liked it - and they turned out just fine! Judging by their bitterness, I'd say that they're carrying an awful lot of spiteful baggage for somebody who turned out just fine.
For those commenters who were worrying that advice turns people into wusses, don't worry, they'll learn. Life is a harsh teacher, but you pull through it with some scrapes and bruises or you don't pull through at all, in which case there is probably more wrong than just being given handouts to HELP you.
While school plays and captaincies might not look like a big deal to someone pushing middle age, in the very sheltered world of a child - and school could conceivably be the world or society at large to one - it's probably like the equivalent of running for president and failing, possibly even more so as they're young and have little to compare with.
Finally, no, life isn't fair - as I've already mentioned. But no, you don't suck it up, nor do you go blindly in and try again to get the same results as before. You up your game and fight harder - and it pays off. If anything, that last part about hard work and fighting for what you want is what we should really be teaching our kids, not telling them that they're special snowflakes or that they're failures and should suck it up. Only then could we end up with a generation that's not as lazy or bitter as some of the examples on offer now.
(In other news, I have a GCSE tomorrow. Eep!)
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